Untwisted, this pie would be made by shepherds on a hillside with mutton & potatoes. But we’re going with cauliflower mash & whatever ground meat is pleasing. If you want a partially twisted pie, feel free to get ye some mutton. If mutton does not appeal, consider a Braxy-ham.
Braxy hams are “the hams of those sheep which die of the braxy. When the herd finds any of his flock dead of that distemper, if they can stand three shakes -that is to say, if they be not so putrefied or rotten that they can stand to be thrice shaken by the neck without falling to pieces- then he bears them home to his master’s house on the braxy shelty. What of the carcasses can then be ham’d, are done, and the rest of the flesh made present use by the family.” This from the Scottish Gallovidian Encyclopedia.
Braxy hams turn regular mutton into a delicacy.
Sometimes I am actually terrified by how spoiled I am. I am literally eating smoked sockeye salmon out of the package with my hands as I type this. I’m eating salmon that has been caught, gutted, smoked, packaged & transported for me, and all I need to do is shove it in my mouth. That is how far I am from shaking a dead sheep violently by the head to see if it is:
a.) so rotten it falls apart; or
But the head-shaking trick could come in handy one day. In case society crumbles or whatnot. So that’s why I’m mentioning it here.
Shepherd’s Pie with 2 Twists
- 1 large or 2 small heads cauliflower
- 1 onion
- 2lbs ground meat (Grass-fed beef, lamb, bison, turkey or chicken)
- A couple of handfuls mushrooms (whole, sliced or quartered)
- Ground sage
- Dried tarragon or fresh parsley
- Himalayan salt (or similar)
- Coconut oil
Steam Cauliflower pieces, including stem. Fry onion, meat, mushrooms & sage until just cooked and place in a baking dish. When cauliflower is soft, pop it in a food processor (or blender) with a generous pinch of tarragon, a shake of salt and a big spoon of coconut oil. Whirl until smooth and spread over of the meat mixture. Bake at 350 until the tips of the white swirls are browned, about 40 minutes.
Mound leftover Twisted Herd Pie into portobello mushroom caps and bake at 350 for half an hour; eat them hot or put them in containers for weekday lunches.